Sometimes I wish I could write down all the mistakes I made in a letter to myself and send it back in time. But it’s all those mistakes and blunders that have created the woman I am and the woman I am becoming.
I wanted to take a minute and share with you how inspiring and powerful you are- I think sometimes we aren’t told how much impact we have- when really that’s part of the human spirit that tends to hold the most value for us.
The night of your birthday, a little drunk and so very big eyed, you said you wanted to be like me when you grew up. I chuckled and sighed, “No you really don’t.” I’ve made so many mistakes along this journey and truly some really great things have spawned from those mistakes. Professionally and personally my failures have led me to believe in magic again, to write, and to recognize a purpose. My gift has always been empathy- which can be used to inspire. I think I never realized how much of an impact I could have on others until you said that. I’ve been on this soul searching path for a little over a year. I went through my first real heart break in life and have finally pieced most of my life puzzle back together. There is still something missing- where can I go from here professionally? What I’m doing right now isn’t fulfilling my heart. The power to inspire others is an inspiring thing itself, isn’t it? There is so much passion there. Then there is this idea of wanting to be able to support myself and have a lifestyle that includes travel. Some of my mother’s best advice to her daughters: make sure you have a way to take care of yourself; because sometimes at the end of the day, no matter who you marry, who your friends are, where your family is- all you have is yourself.
A good friend of mine went on a similar soul searching path a few years ago. She now teaches all over the world- places like Sudan, all over Europe, Korea even a summer in Iraq. She’s a bit of a nomad- which I’m not sure I could ever be as carefree and leave my family for so many years to pursue my heart. But I wanted you to know that you’re my inspiration to go back to school and do something with education. I can teach here and be happy amongst family or choose to live that life of travel and adventure teaching abroad or maybe a bit of both. I think my heart has always known where it needed to go- it just needed a gentle reminder of how powerful it could be.
Now that I’ve told you how you’ve inspired me- let me add kindling to your own fire. You have such a great leader heart within you. I see how you are with the other women you work with- and you also have the gift of empathy. Although there is a mark you are still missing- there is so much power and strength in vulnerability. Courageous leadership takes people that are willing to stand up take risks and show up as REAL imperfect people. Getting knocked down on our asses, looking around for a helping hand up and realizing there isn’t anyone there or maybe offering their hands upon false pretenses… that can really hurt. Hurt can create walls and walls can breed fear. There is that saying that it’s much easier to live a life of disappointment than it is to feel disappointed. Which I personally think is a bunch of bullshit- despite walls we build there is always a bloody raw heart behind it. People will disappoint you. You are going to get hurt.
I ask you, who would you rather follow, take direction from? A raw beating lion heart or someone that holds a wall up as a front to their true nature?
You could run your own company and move a lot of mountains. You have that capability. You have the ability to be captivating and inspiring. Letting to others see that fierceness in you- that you are going to show up, here, alive, and ready to take the risk- that’s goddamn brave and it’s what you are meant to do.
There is what I like to think of as “the calling card of the broken hearted” even if you have walls others that have experienced devastation, true loss can see it within one another. For some it happened very young and they had to grow much too quick.
Don’t let that calling card ever be a weakness, instead make it your drive. Let it be the calling card that magnetizes others to you. No matter where you’ve been, there is always something greater and no matter when things get shitty, they will always get better. They really have no choice but to.
Where ever you go, my fierce one, don’t be afraid to show up as a real person ready to take risks. Risk with all your heart-I promise you’ll find where you are suppose to be if you do.
One of my favorite quotes from a great writer and fellow Rebelle, Andrea Balt-
‘I will love like the house is on fire. And if it’s not I’ll bring the matches.’
Don’t regret not taking the risk just because the house is on fire, sometimes you might even be the fire 😉
KEYS TO THE IGNITION 